Shit We Love
Are you as bored as an antsy nun? Pointless as an albino birdwatcher or just have nothing to do for the next 5 minutes? Well sit the fuck down because we sift through the shite movies, sit through the rick rollings, suffer countless paper-arse-cuts from rubbish books to bring you the coolest shit that you probably wont even watch, read or buy.
Best Bits from the Web
If you thought that shit mad bit in role models where they dress like eijits and fight each other was made up, you will shit your pants when you see this!Its called L.A.R.P or Live Action Role Playing to us normal folk, or Lots of Arseholes Raping Pigs to us funny folk!
This man is a hero! (He’s actually a prick because he disabled embed and now you have this annoying link) Fair enough way too much time on his hands but this is genius! In this clever clip a matchstick man fights his maker using only the tool bars…and alot of time!
I’d like to pay homage to the 400 unlucky guys to attempt this amazing feat unsuccessfully, their bravery in attempting to bring some BALLS to youtube is heroic *pause* now! Watch as punter numero 401 makes a laughing stock out of the 400 other ball bags who fucked up. Enjoy!
There are no words….wow
SHIT HOT GARMS
‘Those eating in the University cafeteria considered us to be bullies but the two of us found art in our food fights and other edible hijinks” say the geniuses at pyknic clothing! They go by the names of the chef and the butcher and the Yankee duo are “seasoned’ veterans when it comes to dreaming up finger licking mad food based threads! There passion for both are the inspiration behind their amazing Pyknicwear clothing line! Honestly their so good they’ll make you go blind and do a small dribble all over yourself! I came across one of their designs in FRONT magazine and it blew me away.
As colorful as they are tasty these tees go for about 25$ which giving the current economy is about… don’t have a bollocking clue. (Ed – around €17 dipshit) and the closest retailer to here is in the UK which is roughly a taxi, plane and taxi away so yer better off whipping out yer 3v card topping up and spending to your hearts content because these tee’s will make YOU the coolest cat in the cave. Check ‘em out here at http://pyknicwear.com/home/
Okay this section brings you the most mentalist WTF products that you’d love to have, but too stingy to spend your well earned dole money on.
100$ toilet paper
€7.00 from www.thumbsupuk.com
Yes now you too can wipe yer anus free of shit just like Bill Gates with this hundred dollar bill jacks paper! We may not be A-mer-i-cane but just affix yourself with a fake moustache, some extra stones, a big hat and a huge belt buckle and hoo the funk would know?
Ice shot glasses
About 5euro from www.thumbsupuk.com
OMFG! Whats better than gettin ’ so drunk you meet your cousin, shit yourself and declare yourself the son of the village idiot? Doing said actions after getting pissed on jager out of shot glasses made from ice that’s what! 5euro gets you an ice tray so unlimited usage for all!
Rubik’s cube salt n’ pepper shakers
15euro from www.firebox.com
Rubik’s cubes first made there colorful appearance when big hair and legwarmers were the shit! Now you can dine in the 80’s with these bitchin, frustration, flavoured salt and pepper shakers. Or if you don’t like salt you can fill them with some very low grade coke like we have. Our chips taste weird.
Here I give what new music I’ve been listening to lately and what’s been giving me eargasms! EARGASMS! Orgasms in yer ears.
Enter Shikari – Common Dreads
“HERE TONIGHT I CLOCK A THOUSAND HEADS. . .HERE TO UNITE THROUGH COMMON DREADS”
Enter Shikari are a bit like Haratio Caine – you either love em or hate em – and I love the bastard! Being my fave band I was anxious as the opening bars of title track “Common dreads” enveloped me! Three songs in all anxiety was gone and I was hopping round the place like a demented monkey on coke. I”ll never listen to music on a bus again!
Making it on to NME new noise 2007 catapulted the trance tykes into stardom as their first offering went to no.4 on the UK charts and went gold in the process. I thought they would take an “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” approach to the dreaded 2nd album but Shikari have made leaps and bounds to insuring there unique sound will grow with them and remain theirs. Highlights are the thumping solidarity, hideously catchy first single juggernauts, teenage drinking anthem hectic with its popper inducing melody and the surprisingly lovely gap in the fence! The album is ripe with anthems too noteworthy. Those being ”the Jester” which is “Parklife” for the millennium and “No Sleep Tonight” which is the hardcore reply to Faithless’ “‘Insomnia”
Rou’s vocals are screechy in places but the lyrics carry an overall good vibe while getting their message heard! The mix between annoyingly political songs and ridiculously cheery tracks is on the button. This album will leave any fan or open minded newcomer with a brain boner, curled up in a corner having done an over excited poo all over your ravey rave pants
Enter shikari hit Dublin on the 10th of December make sure your there for all the E induced fist pumping madness! Tickets from 23e availible from Rollercoaster on Kieran St.
In a shell of nuts: “Raaaaagh Chuggga Chugga Bleep Bleep” Wash Rinse Repeat
Star rating ★★★★
La Roux – La Roux
Are you bored of ‘in for the kill’? Jesus Christ i am but that doesn’t mean the rest of La Roux’s album isn’t properly beast! Especially if you like listning to stroppy gingers singing sad songs over what sounds like a robots love noisings! there are at least four singles on here which is good going for a firsty!
out now -★★★★
Florence and the Machine – Lungs
WOW this is proper shite! Unless what sounds like a drunken goth girl having her period over an orchestra playing at a funeral is your thing steer clear of this ginger wingers offering as I promise you now it will make you flaccid. Basically the opposite of the La Roux album
That my bile covered friends concludes this weeks SHIT WE LOVE your stop for anything fit inducingly awesome! This will *hopefully* be a fortnightly feature which to us normal folks means twice a month, again that’s every TWO WEEKS to the borderline retards! This week’s edition took only all of last night and most of today but next time I have a good two weeks to round up some more awesomely awesome shit that ye cunty cunts ain’t cool enough to own!
Also next time there will be a CINEMADNESS section for recommended movies, DVDs and other crazy shit hot happenings on the movie scene! If you liked this post please comment and if you come across an awesome CD, DVD or some shit hot threads but your to damn lazy to cover it send it to firstname.lastname@example.org
I’ll leave you with this Awesome Collaboration.
KEEP IT CLASSY KILKENNY!